I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
What a dumb baby whore.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
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