I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
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