Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Your topless pictures make me question reality
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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