I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
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