Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
They took my balls.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
