But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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