It's like a parade of train wrecks.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
