Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
