So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
