Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Never underestimate the power of titties
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