Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
you would pick up someone in the library
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
