So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Randomize
