I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
