he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
