Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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