her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
