this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
