i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize