his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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