I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
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