Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
