Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
