Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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