Having a random hookup so left but love u
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
