My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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