he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
