it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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