do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
