Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
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