Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize