Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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