Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Randomize
