I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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