tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
ugly people sure do ruin things
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
