We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
