I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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