ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
