check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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