youre lurking in front of me
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Randomize
