I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
