I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
