omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Randomize