i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
