in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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