We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
We were destined to go to rehab together
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
