Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
