Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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