Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
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