whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Randomize
