Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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